


Glorious Confusion

by Misskiku



Series: Bederia Goodness [16]
Category: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:20:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24861463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misskiku/pseuds/Misskiku
Summary: Gloria gets a ticket to see Bede's latest play in the Ballonlea Grand Theatre, unaware of what takes place in one of the scenes with Bede, which leaves her hurt and confused.Based on an idea my friend Kagu had that I just had to write!
Relationships: Beet | Bede/Yuuri | Gloria
Series: Bederia Goodness [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1630534
Comments: 11
Kudos: 112





	Glorious Confusion

**Author's Note:**

> Well. This is a bit self-indulgent, but sometimes a good hurt/comfort fic can be cathartic.

Gloria stepped out of the Sky Taxi with a gasp of awe, taking in the sight before her. Ballonlea had come alive. The usually quiet town was full of people dressed to impress, full of waistcoats and elegant gowns, of high heels and perfume, all heading in the same direction. Ballonlea's Grand Theatre. 

Gloria stood tall, a breath of giddy excitement filling her lungs. She nervously brushed the asymmetric hem of her pale pink dress, absently dusted a curl of her brown hair off her cheek. She stole her hands to her sides again, reminding herself not to touch her face. Especially not her eyes. Sonia and Nessa had gone to a lot of trouble helping her get ready for tonight and she didn't want to ruin it before the play had even started. 

The play. Her heart skipped. She fell into step with the crowd, pulled along like a leaf swept away in the current of a river, unable to dampen the smile on her face. Her footsteps felt light, like she was walking on air and not in four-inch heels. For the umpteenth time that evening, she checked that the ticket was securely tucked away in her black clutch. It was. The VIP ticket was still there. The sight of it made something flutter in her chest. 

She remembered the way Bede had practically shoved the ticket into her hands, muttering something about it being Ms Opal's idea since Gloria had never caught one of Ballonlea's plays before. She'd never seen a play at all. She'd never even stepped foot in a theatre before. And now she had. 

Her gaze was immediately drawn around the lobby, to the high ceiling and plush carpet, to the ornate pillars and well-dressed staff. She followed the signs, and the crowd, in a daze. It was like something out of a movie. Like she was living a dream. The staff took one look at her VIP ticket and she was ushered ahead of the line to her front row seat. She fell into the cushy chair, unable to remember if she'd blinked at all since entering the theatre. 

This was actually happening. She was going to see a play. She was sitting in the front row. As a VIP. Not only that, but the ticket came with a special meet-and-greet with the actors afterwards. With the leads of the play. Which meant... Bede. 

Gloria didn't know where to look. Her gaze wandered as the seats behind her began to fill. She shifted in her chair. Glanced over her shoulder, glanced towards the stage as if she'd be able to catch a peek of anything - or anyone - behind the curtain. She wondered if Bede was there. Her heart pounded in her chest, her anticipation growing with every minute. 

She didn't know what to expect. What the play, and Bede, would be like. She'd known he'd been a part of Ballonlea's plays before, had even been the lead actor before, but she'd never had the chance to see him in action. And it wasn't because of a lack of interest. No, Gloria had been keen to catch one of Bede's plays since the start, but with her duties the new Champion she had never gotten a chance. Until now. With over a year of performing under his belt, Gloria bubbled with excitement of what Bede would be like on stage. 

Gloria lost herself in the atmosphere, amazed when she glanced over her shoulder to see that almost all the seats were filled with people. She held her breath when the lights dimmed and the buzz of noise vanished in an instant. Silence fell. 

And the play began. The world faded around her and she was enraptured. Entranced by the graceful movements of the actors, the intricate details of their outfits, her eyes following them across the stage and- 

She recognised Bede immediately. The air sucked from her lungs in a silent gasp and all she could see was him. His long legs powered him onto the stage with elegant strides. His platinum blond hair, swept off his forehead to the side, almost glistened in the light. His violet eyes blazed with steely confidence. The well-fitting suit accentuated his tall, lean figure, as though he were a model and not a Gym Leader. 

Gloria couldn't think when he spoke. His voice carried, his words clear and strong as though he were standing right in front of her and not on the stage. She heard him clearly and not at all. His words, the lines of his co-stars, were drowned out by the steady thumping of her heart. She was mesmerised, unable to pull her eyes away. She didn't want to. She couldn't. This was a side of Bede she'd never seen before, confident and poised as always and yet so strikingly different. He held his head high. His gaze was focused, looking far beyond the stage and the crowd before him. He wove emotions into each movement, each line and word. Like he was casting a spell, enchanting the audience. 

He was enchanting her. 

It didn't matter that the plot of the play was lost to Gloria. Bede captivated her with everything he had. From the soft smiles on his face to the burning rage in his voice, the subtle tremors in his hands. Each scene played out flawlessly. Gloria's heart leapt and sank, skipped and fluttered with each delivery as though Bede was a Litten playing with the strings of her heart. The raw emotion in his voice made Gloria's throat tighten. Her hands clasped on her lap. He swept across the stage towards the lady playing his opposite, coming to an abrupt halt before her. The pain in his line rippled through Gloria. The lady gave a tearful reply. The silence hung in the air, Gloria holding her breath, before Bede pulled the actress towards him and kissed her. 

The stage went dark. The curtain fell, lights flickering on above the audience and bathing them in light. The crowd erupted into applause, whistles and cheers and claps filling the room. The intermission announcement spoke over the noise. 

Gloria heard nothing. She saw nothing but the heavy curtain in front of her and Bede kissing that actress. Pulling her into his arms. His eyes closing as he drew close and- 

Gloria stood with a start. Her hands shook, her heart racing in her chest faster and harder than ever before. So fast it was painful. Nauseating. She turned and shuffled down the row of seats and into the aisle, joining the swarm of people eager for fresh air during the intermission. It was all a buzz of noise, of blinding lights and stumbled steps. 

Her heart pounded harder. Faster. Something tight coiled around her throat, making her want to gag. She pushed through the crowd. Stumbled into the cool air outside as pain prickled behind her eyes. 

She didn't stop, her legs moving in time with her frantic heartbeats. She didn't stop, even when her heels began to burn and her toes began to throb. She didn't stop and left Ballonlea, the theatre, Bede and that actress, behind her. 

But the memory followed her. It played in her mind, again and again. An endless loop of Bede embracing a woman Gloria didn't know and kissing her. A slow, deep kiss that froze behind her eyes when she blinked.

_ He kissed her. _

A sob tore from her throat, burning with acidic bile. Her vision blurred with tears but she saw that scene clearly in her mind. Pain rippled through her body as her lungs heaved for air. She staggered onward. Her heel caught on a root and she tripped, sprawling into the dirt and onto her hands and knees. She winced, gasping a sob of pain. The sharp rocks beneath her left her palms and knees scraped and bloody. The black earth stained the front of her dress. Her new dress. 

She clambered to her feet, hastily brushing the stones off her trembling palms. 

_ He kissed her. _

She staggered forward a step. Her stomach lodged high in her throat, raw and burning. Everything hurt. Her knees, her hands, her chest. She reached for a tree to steady herself, sagging against it. Her mind span and churned with her gut. Pain she'd never felt before lanced through her body with every beat of her heart. She gasped for air as though winded. A silent scream slicing her throat as she braced herself against the tree. 

Everything was wrong. The pain. The deep ache in her chest, the nausea swamping her lungs. How she couldn't erase that scene from her mind. Why it kept replaying over and over and over again. 

Why it hurt so much. 

_ Why did it hurt so much? _

Gloria pushed off the tree and deeper into the Tangle, into the darkness and the cold where she didn't have to see. Where the cool, damp air embraced her until she went numb. Where it filled her lungs with a different kind of pain. 

Her legs gave way. She sank to her knees, doubling over with a broken wail. Hot tears burned down her cheeks. She shuddered and shook with every breath, heaving with gasps and sobs and pressing her forehead into the earth as she crumbled. She fractured into pieces, alone and in the dark. Away from the bustle and life of Ballonlea, Gloria wailed and cried until there was nothing left. 

* * *

A heavy ache gnawed into her bones that she knew wasn't just from the cold. She didn't know what it was. She didn't know why every fibre of her being thrummed with pain as though she'd splintered into a thousand pieces, as though the shattered remains of her heart had pierced her flesh and left her bleeding. Lying there in the dirt. Dying. 

It hurt. 

She felt hollow. The memory of Bede kissing that actress, that stranger, made her feel empty. Her heart had been replaced with a heavy weight that sunk deep into her gut. 

_ He kissed her.  _

That thought brought back the tears. They washed over her eyes, blurring the distant lights of the glowing mushrooms into fuzzy patches of colour. 

Something was wrong with her. It didn't make sense. Nothing made sense. Not the pain, the nausea, the acrid bile burning up her throat. Not the fact that seeing Bede kiss that actress had this affect on her. 

Her lips trembled, and she squeezed her eyes shut as a fresh wave of tears filled her eyes. 

_ What's wrong with me? _

_ Why am I feeling this way? _

She had been so happy. So excited, so mesmerised by the play. By Bede. And everything had broken in an instant. Like a stone thrown at a mirror, her reality had shattered into pieces.

A single moment was all it took. A single scene. A single kiss and the curtains had fallen on her heart and shrouded her in darkness. 

Shouldn't she have been happy? Shouldn't she still be there, watching the play Bede had spent months and months practicing for? Shouldn't she be there to cheer him on, to support his acting, to watch the play he'd given her tickets to? 

Her breath quavered with a quiet sob. 

She didn't want to see it. She didn't want to watch that again. She didn't want to see Bede with that actress, to see him kiss her again. She didn't want it. 

She couldn't, even though it hurt. Guilt trickled through her veins as cold as ice, and she curled up on her side as she began to sob again. 

She hated it. Hated herself for feeling this way. She hated herself for fleeing, for running away, and for the burning anger stewing in her gut. Anger and resentment. Towards Bede. Towards that actress, the stranger, the one who Bede had kissed. 

She hated it. All of it. She hated them, she hated herself. Her nails raked into the dirt as another tremor of pain spread through her body. 

It hurt.

She closed her eyes until she didn't feel anymore. 

* * *

Gloria's gaze focused on the silver watch around her wrist, inches from her face on the dirt. The play had ended. She should have been backstage, meeting the cast, not lying on the ground in the Glimwood Tangle. She felt the threat of tears sting her eyes and shut down that thought. 

A violent buzzing made Gloria jolt, a spear of adrenaline shooting down her spine before she realised it was her phone. She sighed and let it ring. The insistent vibrating continued for a moment before finally stopping. Silence returned. Gloria's eyes began to shut when the buzzing sounded again. 

She let her phone ring out a second time. She was too heavy to move. Her bones, her muscles, had turned to stone. She lay there, unmoving, as her phone began to ring again. A third time. 

She felt nothing. 

The buzzing ended once more. Barely a beat passed before it started again. Another call.

Gloria felt nothing and did nothing. She waited for the call to drop, for silence to come back once more. 

Her phone buzzed to life for a fifth time. Finally, the annoying buzzing sparked enough irritation in Gloria for her to sit up and dig her phone out of her clutch. She stared at the screen, her vision blurring behind tears at the sight of Bede's name. 

This time, she hung up. 

Nothing happened. The silence returned, broken by Gloria's stifled sobs. Then the messages started. 

_ Are you okay?  _

_ Where are you?  _

_ Did something happen?  _

_ Gloria, please answer your phone.  _

_ Please.  _

_ Let me know you're okay. _

The messages came one after the other, a minute or two in between. Each one drew a sliver of guilt deeper into Gloria's heart. Her hand trembled around her phone. 

Her phone buzzed again. Gloria accepted the call with a tug on her heart, squeezing her eyes shut as tears fell again and again. 

"Gloria? Oh, thank Arceus you answered. Where are you?" 

Bede's voice, the concern in his tone, made it impossible for her to answer. She opened her mouth, held her phone to her ear, but no sound came out. Her heart, lodged in her throat, didn't let her speak. She couldn't say a single word. 

"Gloria?" 

_ I'm sorry,  _ her heart ached. 

"Are you there?" 

_ I'm sorry.  _

"What's wrong?" 

Her breath hitched. The faintest sound escaping her throat. Something scraping across the floor sounded through the phone into Gloria's ear. 

"Where are you?" he asked, a thread of urgency in his voice. "Are you in the theatre?"

Gloria dropped her head. She couldn't speak, couldn't form a single word. A tiny sob broke from her chest. 

"Gloria, if you're there…" Silence. "Tap on your phone. Please." 

Tears spilled down her cheeks as she tapped the side of her phone with her nail, twice in quick succession. 

Bede sighed in relief. "Thank Arceus… Okay, let's try this. Tap if you're in the theatre." 

Silence. 

"Are you in Ballonlea?" 

Silence. She shook her head, knowing he couldn't see her. 

"Did you go home?" 

She did nothing, letting his voice linger in her ears. 

"Are you-" Bede cut himself off, saying something away from the phone. "Are you in the Glimwood Tangle?" 

She sniffled, tears coming faster as she tapped her phone again. 

"Alright, I'm coming. Don't hang up, I'll be there soon, okay?" 

She gave a single tap in reply, cradling her phone to her ear. 

He continued speaking. "You had me worried, not turning up like that when you're always on time to  _ everything." _

He sighed. The phone rustled for a few moments. "It doesn't help that this place is a maze…" A huff. His breathing became audible, faint pants coming through the phone. 

"Gloria." 

His voice echoed and Gloria lifted her head as Bede strode towards her, his hair disheveled and cheeks flushed with effort. He knelt on the ground before her, taking her hands. 

"What in Arceus' name happened?" he asked softly, turning her hands gently in his and noticing the grazes on her palms. 

The concern in his voice was what broke her. She fell into him as though he was the only thing left in this world, the only solid structure in the turmoil coursing through her. Her head hit his shoulder and she sobbed. His arms wrapped around her and she wailed. She clung to him, her dirt and blood caked hands grabbing desperately for him as she cried. 

She gasped for air by the crook of his neck, pain and guilt tearing like snarp nails down her throat. 

"I- I'm so- sorry…!" she apologised through her gasps, between her sobs and sniffles. "I'm sorry…!" 

Bede's hands slowly drew up and down her back comfortingly, listening in silence as she repeated her apology again and again. He waited until she fell quiet, until her sobs faded and her apologies ceased.

He held her close. 

"There's nothing for you to apologise about." 

His words were calm. He spoke softly by her ear as her breathing began to ease. She sniffled, his reassurance cutting like a dagger into her heart. She closed her eyes, resting her forehead against the top of his shoulder. 

"I… I feel so stupid," she croaked. 

His touch on her back was warm and tender, the gentle pressure of his hands setting the painful pace of her heart.

"Why would you feel stupid?" 

"I don't know." It hurt. Tears began to form again. "I don't know. I don't understand. I don't… I don't know why I feel like this…" 

"Did something happen?" 

She saw the scene again in her mind. Like a bolt of lightning straight through her heart. 

Gloria exhaled a shaky breath. "I just… feel like, maybe I got everything mixed up. Like I don't… I don't really know you. I never thought you'd-" 

She couldn't say it. 

"What do you mean you don't know me? Is this because of the play? Surely you realise it was all an act." 

"... Not all of it…" 

"Yes, all of it. That's what plays are. Acting. None of it was real." 

"I saw it. I saw you… kiss her." 

Bede's hands stilled on her back. 

"You can't tell me that wasn't real." 

"It wasn't. That was a stage kiss." 

"You still kissed her…" 

"No, I didn't. It was fake. We didn't actually… our lips never touched." 

Gloria blinked for a moment against Bede's shoulder. She frowned, then drew off him and met his eyes. 

"But… I saw you! I saw you kiss her!" 

Bede's eyes widened fractionally. "That's what it's meant to look like to the audience. That's the whole point." 

"But…" 

"If you get the angle right, and position your hand properly, it'll look like a kiss even though your lips haven't touched." 

"You mean…?" The weight eased off her chest. 

"I didn't kiss her. We opted for a fake kiss because I… wasn't entirely comfortable with a real one." He glanced away. "Not like that, anyway…" he added quietly. 

"It was fake?" 

Everything seemed to settle. The chaos roaring in her veins, in her mind, settled. 

"Is that what was bothering you? You thought I'd kissed her?" 

His question stunned her for a moment. 

_ Was that… Was that all it was? _

"I mean, that was a part of it," Gloria said quickly. She suddenly felt out of place, Bede suddenly felt too close. "It- it didn't make sense, that's all. I didn't think you'd do something like that, and in front of so many people and I- I… got confused." 

"Confused? Confused about what?"

"I… don't know. Everything. All of it." 

She couldn't look at him. He was too close. Her hands lingered, frozen at his sides, with her fingers gripping the fabric of his suit jacket. Her mind ground to a halt when he cupped her cheek. His thumb dusted beneath her eye before his hand shifted to tilt her head up, angling her face towards him. Their eyes met and Gloria couldn't breathe under his heated gaze. Something deep and alluring danced behind his violet eyes, drawing her in closer, closer to him. He dipped his head towards her, his breath washing against her parted lips. 

"This is as close as we got," Bede said. He pulled away, dropping his hand from her cheek. "That's how you stage a fake kiss." 

Gloria bristled with a surge of heat. "Wh-What?! Don't- Don't do that all of a sudden! I thought you were going to… to…" 

A spark jolted between them and Gloria looked away. A strange tingle trickled through her veins to tips of her fingers before pooling with warmth in her belly. 

Bede's voice was quiet. "You thought I was going to… to kiss you?"

"Well, yeah! That's what it felt like!" Gloria squawked. "Arceus, Bede. You scared me. Don't make fun of me like that." 

He huffed. "How is that making fun of you? I thought you were confused as to how a fake kiss works." 

"It felt like you were teasing me… since I've never been kissed before." 

Bede stiffened in the corner of her eyes. "H-How was I meant to know that? And what does that have to do with anything?!" 

"What? I thought you knew!" 

"Why would I know that?" 

"Well, since… since I've never dated before…" 

"I don't see what that has to do with anything…" Bede sighed. "I think we're getting off track here." 

Gloria pouted, her cheeks as flushed as Bede's. "You started it by trying to kiss me." 

"I wasn't trying to kiss you," Bede huffed. "Even if I was, I wouldn't have done it like-" 

Their eyes met. 

"F-Forget it. This isn't getting us anywhere."

Gloria sighed. The weird giddy feeling in her lungs from before the play had returned. She shivered slightly in the cool air before Bede draped his suit jacket over her shoulders, enveloping her in warmth. She startled, meeting his gaze before he looked away. A slash of pink burned high on his cheeks. 

"How did you end up here?" he asked, sitting back enough to give her space. 

Gloria tugged his jacket around her, grateful for it's warmth. Bede's warmth. The fluttering returned. 

"I just kinda… walked here." She shrugged. "I left during the intermission and just… walked." 

"You left during the intermission? You've been here that long?" 

She looked at the ground. "I guess," she said, feeling him study her face, her expression. 

"Is that really all that happened? That kiss was enough to upset you this much?" 

Gloria drew her lips into a pout. "I don't know. I felt like… like I'd gotten everything wrong about you when it happened. I couldn't imagine you being so…  _ okay _ with kissing someone like that, and I didn't even know her and perhaps you two were actually together and… see, the whole thing is stupid." 

"Well… you were right." 

"What?" 

"I wasn't comfortable with it. So, you were right after all."

Gloria managed a tight smile. "It was so weird. Like… like if I saw Hop kissing someone I didn't know, it was such a shock." 

Except… that comparison didn't feel right, somehow. 

"After that… everything just spiralled. I didn't understand why I felt like this or why I was so upset and… I felt guilty."

"For what?" 

She shrugged heavily. "For the way I felt. For getting so upset about something so stupid when I should have been happy for you. It's none of my business whether you kiss someone or not during a play and yet the way I was acting…" She sighed. "I had no right to feel the way I did and that just made it worse. It became a huge mess of… bleh." 

She motioned wildly in the air. 

"You don't need to feel guilty for how you felt," Bede said gently. "Or how you reacted. That doesn't bother me at all. I'm glad it wasn't… anything more serious." 

She nodded slowly, trying to let his words sink in enough so she could actually believe it. She wanted to believe it. 

"I still feel a bit ridiculous, running away like this.I didn't realise I'd come this far. I started walking and… I could tell I was going to cry and didn't want anyone to see me so I left and… and I missed the rest of the play. The backstage meeting too. And after you gave me a VIP ticket…" 

"I can always arrange another meeting if you'd like." 

Gloria shook her head, a small smile gracing her lips. "No, that's fine. It's probably better if I don't meet them…" she added that last part quietly. She didn't want to see that actress again. "Although…"

"What is it?" 

"I want to see you act again. You were… really good. I couldn't keep my eyes off you." 

"O-Oh." There was a strange hitch to Bede's voice that made Gloria study him for a moment. "The next play won't be for a while." 

"That's okay, I can wait." 

When Bede met her eyes again his expression was different. As though he was trying to figure something out, his gaze lingered on her. It made the air feel strangely warm. 

"Are you feeling better now?" he asked. 

She nodded. "Yeah, I am. My thoughts were a bit of a mess but… talking to you really helped. Thank you." 

He nodded curtly and stood, before offering Gloria a hand and helping her to her feet. She went to brush the dirt off her dress before grimacing. 

"Ugh. And it was such a pretty dress too…" 

"A decent dry cleaner should be able to get that out," Bede said. "I can give you the name of the one we used for our costumes if you'd like." 

"Would you? Oh, that'd be great! This is the first time I've worn it, I'd hate for it to be ruined…" 

She brushed the dirt off her palms before reaching up to touch her grime-smudged cheeks. 

"And my makeup is ruined too… Sonia and Nessa would kill me if they saw this after going to all that trouble…" she grumbled. "It's such a waste… I bet I look like a Zizagoon now with all my mascara and eyeliner smudged." 

A thumb brushed her cheek, swiping off a streak of dirt. Bede lowered his head, mouth by her ear and said, quietly, "I think you still look beautiful." 

Bede stepped away, turning to head back the way he'd come. "Come on. It's getting late - unless you'd rather spend the night in the Tangle?" 

"I-I'm coming!" She hurried after him, his words echoing in her ears. 

_ Did that mean what she thought it did…?  _

She stared at his back, at the odd leaf and twig caught in his disheveled hair. She remembered how breathless he'd sounded when he'd found her. Warmth bloomed across her cheeks, her mind beginning to spin. 

She felt more confused now than ever before. 

For the first time, however, it didn't bother her. 


End file.
